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Isnit hard for.men to stay committed8/14/2023 ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() The roots of this fear can go either way, so it’s important to dig a little deeper into the specifics that come up for you. We’ve all seen or experienced examples of unhealthy relationships, whether they were our own relationships from the past, our friends’ relationships, or our parent’s relationships. You’re Afraid The Relationship Won’t Change Then, take a peek at the five most common relationship fears below to see what your fears might mean. What does this question evoke for you? What does your head say? What does your heart say? What does your gut say? Don’t judge the reactions you notice, just pay attention to them. Ask yourself, “what, exactly, am I afraid of?” See if you can allow yourself to be curious, open, and honest about your answers. The first step for you is to take some quiet, uninterrupted time to reflect on your fears. Sometimes the fears are about the commitment itself, and sometimes they’re about the person you’re committing to. It’s natural to feel scared, hesitant, or unsure, but the tricky part is figuring out what those fears mean. They require an insane amount of vulnerability. At its essence, I think this is a question about fear. How do I know if I’m just being commitment-phobic or if this isn’t the relationship I’m supposed to be in? I don’t want to settle for someone who isn’t right for me, but I also don’t want to throw away a good relationship just because I'm afraid of any longterm relationship, period."Ī: Thanks for the question, but man is it a doozy! This is one of the most challenging relationship questions that I get. I started pulling away and noticing all of these things that seem like incompatibilities between the two of us. I found myself feeling unsure about our relationship. I don’t know how or why, but something changed recently, even though nothing happened. Things are going oddly great, and I could see a future for our relationship. Q: "I’ve been dating someone for close to a year. Now on to this week's question: why you can't commit - and how to prevent it from sabotaging your relationships. No gender, sexual orientation, or question is off limits, and all questions remain anonymous. But how often do we hear the nitty-gritty of how we can actually better understand our deepest desires and most embarrassing questions? Bustle has enlisted Vanessa Marin, a sex therapist, to help us out with the details. We’re always hearing that we could be having better sex, a better orgasm, or a better relationship. ![]()
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